Posts Tagged beards
Beards
If beard growing became a national sporting activity, I strongly suspect that the organisers would soon find themselves in the High Court amidst accusations of sexism, and ageism. It is true to say that hair is a fussy commodity which only grows on the chins certain specimens. Those challenged in this way include; babies, pre-pubescent boys and pre-menopausal women. Everyone else sprouts hair freely.
I do not fall into any of the above categories yet I am beardless. Why? Because I choose to be. I make an effort, spend money and take time to be able to unashamedly call myself a beardless man. Don’t be fooled with phrases such as “I’m thinking of growing a beard” or “I’m trying to grow a beard” or “It took me ages to grow this beard”, because essentially anyone who has a beard has only succeeded in one thing… doing nothing. Yes, a beard is the nasty side-effect of non-activity. Now I am aware that some of you may be donning a beard and perhaps even stroking it fondly as you read these words. So before I am accused of beardism, let me categorically state that I have no problem with your beard (or what you do with it). Just don’t expect me to congratulate you for gaining a growth on your face which, quite frankly, takes about as much effort as gathering dust in an empty house.
The top five “beardoes” - as voted by the British public - are: (in reverse order)
4 comments July 15, 2008
Big Bother
Log on to a webpage, switch on the TV, sit in a bar, go out with friends and it happens! Maybe if I sat in a dark, sealed hatch at the bottom of the ocean I could escape the constant bombardment of Big Brother trivia! Why do we need to know if Rebecca has had her chips or if Luke has a shave for the first time on Wednesday 11 June at 12.05pm!!
People are asking “have you seen Big Brother?” My answer is invariably “no” but yet I seem to know every housemate by their first name and regularly see intrusive personal pictures on most entertainment and news websites. Go away BB - leave us in peace to watch TV, read a newspaper, check our inboxes and sip our pints - Just Go!
Add comment June 11, 2008

